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Carrying and siblings: Sensitive tips for young mothers
Life as a new mom brings plenty of challenges — and countless little joys. One of the most beautiful ways to build a close bond with your baby is babywearing. But what if you also have an older child? In this article you’ll learn how to integrate babywearing into daily life without your older child feeling left out — with ideas, routines, and practical tips.
Table of ContentWhy babywearing matters
Babywearing strengthens bonding as your baby feels your heartbeat, hears your voice, and enjoys your scent. It supports your baby’s self-regulation — gentle motion, warmth, and closeness create safety. Day to day, babywearing gives you real freedom to act: hands free for cooking, homework with the older one, or a quick errand. Whether a woven wrap or a ring sling, both distribute weight close to your body and allow ergonomic positions (M-position, clear airways).
Including older siblings
When you carry, your older child may sometimes feel “left out.” With small, reliable rituals they feel seen and important. Three effective approaches:
1. Create a shared carrying experience
- Bring a favorite toy: Let your older child choose a cuddly friend to “come along.”
- Give mini helper roles: Count buttons, collect leaves, help “check the wrap” (“is the tail tidy?”).
- Join-in carrying: A small kid bag or a simple doll carrier boosts pride and inclusion.
2. Encourage role play
Kids love role play! With a doll or stuffed animal, your older child can “carry” just like you. Act out scenes together — baby is sleepy, needs a hat, wants to look at leaves. This builds empathy, a sense of competence, and deepens sibling bonding.
3. One-on-one time
Schedule short exclusive moments — 10 minutes of puzzles, a book, or a quick game of tag. Meanwhile baby stays safely in the wrap/sling. Communicate transitions (“When the sand timer runs out I’ll change baby — right now it’s our time”). Your firstborn experiences reliable attention.
Linen Fabric
Hemp Fabric
Choosing the right carrier
Woven wrap: highly adjustable, ideal from birth. You can vary carries (front/hip), fine-tune layers for temperature, and achieve very precise support — excellent for longer carries or sensitive babies.
Ring sling: unbeatable for quick ups and downs, the preschool drop-off, stairs, or a bus ride. The rings allow micro-adjustments on the go — perfect when baby often wants up/down.
Pro tip: The wrap counts as one clothing layer. Choose breathable fabrics (cotton, linen, hemp) and always aim for the M-position (knees above bum) and clear airways.
Linen Fabric
Cotton Fabric
Hemp Fabric
You can’t go wrong
Every family is different. Give yourself permission to try things out: some days a wrap fits best, on others a sling. What matters is that you feel comfortable and baby is well supported. Your older child benefits when you’re relaxed — they sense it immediately.
Conclusion
Babywearing is a loving shortcut through family life — even with an older child. By actively involving your firstborn and creating small time islands, you keep the atmosphere calm and the bond strong. Remember: it’s not only about carrying, but about the quality of time together.
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Frequently asked questions (FAQ)
- How can I include my older child when I carry the baby?
Use role play (carry a doll), offer small helper roles (pass the hat, hold the wrap tail), and set shared tasks (collect leaves). This helps them feel seen and involved. - What’s the difference between a woven wrap and a ring sling?
A woven wrap is highly adjustable and ideal from birth; a ring sling is especially quick to put on/take off — perfect for short trips and frequent up/downs. - How do I find the right carrier?
Try both and focus on comfort for you and ergonomics for baby (M-position, clear airways). Consider fabric and season. - Can I nurse in a wrap?
Yes. Many parents nurse discreetly in a wrap or sling. Always keep airways clear and re-tighten to a safe fit after feeding. - How long can I carry my baby?
As long as it’s comfortable for both of you. Many carriers are rated up to about 15 kg, but your body cues and comfort matter more than numbers.
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